Lightmind Extract 001
Broken Yogi 7.19.05
To answer your first question, there’s plenty of good and bad in Adi Da. I don’t think it’s necessary to subscribe to XD’s black sorcery theory of Da in order to acknowledge that the bad side to Da is real and can’t be glossed over. Unlike 😄 and others, I’m happy to acknowledge that there’s a good side to Da also, and there’s no need to feel that one must reject everything good about one’s experience in Adidam, or even spiritually with Da, to move on.
The real question is, just because we experience some good, transcendental things with Da, do we have to stay with him forever? Personally, I always thought the answer to that was yes. It’s part of the dynamic of the way Daists think to imagine that either Da is all true or all false, and that if you have experienced anything undeniably true in Da’s presence or through association with him, everything about him must be true, and everything he says about himself must be true, and that means of course that you are bound to him forever, and cannot grow spiritually except through Da and Adidam. This is something of the core Adidam message that keeps people hanging around and wobbling even when they have migrated far away from the scene. It’s also a rather crippling mindset that’s hard to shake, because we tend not to think that we actually think this way.
As I said in a recent post to Sam on the other forum, the reason Adidam devotional practices “work” isn’t because Adi Da is something unique and special that has no precedent and that you can’t find anywhere else. Exactly the opposite is true. THe reason they work is because devotion itself is true, when the practitioner’s devotional intent is true. In other words, it’s YOU who make your devotional practice true and fruitful, not the object of your devotion, whether it be Adi Da or Jesus or whomever. So if your devotional life bears fruit when you give it any energy, this is a sign that YOU are devotionally alive and capable of practicing fruitfully. It’s not a sign that you need to be a Daist in order for your spiritual practice to be effective. It is a sign, certainly, that you have to practice devotion and study and all the things you mention as being positive. You can’t just sit around and hope that devotional practice will come alive without engaging it. But you have to realize that the source of the practice is in the heart of the devotee, in your love of the divine, not in some human or celestical figure you are accustomed to making the object of your devotion.
When you do understand that, your devotion will become free and strong, and not limited by the form or object of devotion. Devotion is in the subject, not the object. Strengthen your subject-position, the Self-position, and devote yourself to That. If you do, you will find yourself drawn to devotional figures who support the freedom in you, rather than try to bind you eternally to themselves. You will find yourself drawn to teachers and teachings that support that freedom in you, and others who do not will fall away.
I think you will find that Adi Da and Adidam simply do not support this kind of freedom. They support only bondage to the signs, symbols, and physical constraints of the relationship to Adi Da himself. That’s pretty well laid out in all the literature, and it’s laid out in virtually everything that’s done in Adidam. If you buy that as necessary for you to practice spiritual life, then hey, who am I to butt in? But if you can get enough freedom to realize that Adidam is not necessary, that you can apply your devotional intent to other forms of practice and have it be true, then your options open up tremendously. In essence, you realize you have nothing to fear, nothing to lose, except your own integrity if you compromise it for the sake of some spiritual contract you think you’ve made with Da. (Remember that vow? Does it sound like a freedom-pact to you?)
So I hope things work out for you. Would be glad to discuss details if you like.
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