Lightmind Extract 035


~T 2/13.05

I’m glad now that I posted to you. David’s comments was entirely humorous in my book. Saying that another has a “fixation” has psychobabble connotations. Using terms like “guru fixation” as a supposedly knowledgeable evaluation of another and comments and evaluations about word etc. can even sound judgmental to some ears. They are ways of fixing another. If anything, I have been a bane to inflated types from Da to Castaneda and have intact preserved my indigestibility to guru-type enzymes. If you’ve been reading my palaver, my takes is that power-tripping types who have attainted to some plateau find inadmissible the reality that infantile wounds are yet directing their inflated activity hour by hour. It’s been many years since I spoke with Da. My experience, no kidding, was that he was really a weak individual whose ego needed the fawning of others to feed him to the point where he could not bear honest inquiry. What an eye-opener. Nowadays I have to look at myself.

The sub-culture may not be conducive to what you’re doing yet to pit yourself against it is another kind of mythological enactment There may be 5% conducive elements. What I’m looking at is the possible battle of self against those who would deny self and the path of self. This applies to myself too.

My understanding of the non-dual path at this point is that all paths and all people’s sense of path are valid. We are all working on the same thing as I see it.

…I appreciate this – not the etiquette. Who can evaluate how far along anyone is, when their canvas will be completely painted or how they may fly into openness at any moment. Old saying: Those who think they are near be may far, those who think they are far may be near.

I think you or I can be quite near yet deterred by . . . almost nothing, that damned, obstinate, obdurate nothing.

I appreciate what you are saying more than you may think. The idea that you or I should be father along is worthy of further inquiry. This kind of evaluation of self or other, speaking for myself, is more the voice of a wound than any surveyor’s measurement. It can also be the voice of a passion to complete self or create, a voice that will not be stilled. Holding that I/you/we ought to be farther along may also mean that we are fooling ourselves and limiting, grieving or imploding upon our own possibility by that very evaluation. I like this “farther along” inquiry and investigating the energy that sustains this idea. Is it true? word man, what if it isn’t? In a way, that might be hard to take, although surely not entirely. Viva.

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