I have never done anything for the ocean
As much as it has done for me
It has carried me buoyant
And loved me
Probably even as I offended the Nagas and peed in it
I have never done anything for God
Except expected him to change my diapers, and to comfort me,
When the world wasn’t going just my way.
I have never done anything for my parents,
Except having shit in the bathtub and disappointed them constantly
I have never done anything for my friends,
Except embarrassed them on behalf of me,
And called them up drunk and sobbing at two in the morning, expecting them to solve my problems
I have never done anything for music,
Except expecting it to bring me constant bliss, without returning a single thing.
My better half consists of every area of life, which I have always betrayed, again and again.
While even the most modest tokens I’ve tried to deliver to them have been returned unfailingly
In fact embarrassingly.
In an economy of Grace,
Which is Reality,
Does any of this hold true?
I don’t know, as I am still learning.
If you give something to something,
It will always be returned. This is without any doubt whatsoever, as water is wet
The problem is, the economy of Grace. If I am being loved back, so much more than I can ever give,
Then what do I do? What does ego say to that?
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